Cheech scene, The Last Adventure of Pedro and Man

SFX, ORDINARY-MAN, LOWRIDER*BAND

FADE IN
EXT. STREET DOWNTOWN LA
ANGLE ON PEDRO

The camera finds Pedro at work, a car dealership. Pedro is in the sales managers office and is being chewed out for not selling enough vehicles.

MR. RATERRO
Look Pedro, I have had this conversation with you before.
Pedro nods his head in agreement but rolls his eyes sarcastically.

PEDRO
Yes, I know Mr. Raterro but most of these people don’t qualify for these cars.
Mr. Raterro slams his fist on his desk.

MR. RATERRO
I know they don’t qualify and if you keep doing business as usual, they never will.
Pedro stands up.

PEDRO
What am I supposed to do if I cannot get them qualified?
Mr. Raterro stands up and looks Pedro dead in the eye.

MR. RATERRO
You’re a community college graduate right? Get creative. How do you think all those people who bought homes that they could not afford got approved?
Pedro shrugs his shoulders

PEDRO
Beats me.
Mr, Raterro is almost ready to blow, his face is turning a deep red.

MR. RATERRO
When boy, when are you going to start doing the job I hired you to do!

Mr. Raterro takes a few deep breaths and sits back down.

MR. RATERRO (CONT’D)
Have a seat Pedro, look all you need to do is to help them lie a little. If they pay two-thousand dollars a month for rent, you put twelve hundred. Little things like that.

Pedro also sits down

PEDRO
That’s all?

Mr. Raterro nods his head up and down in agreement.

MR. RATERRO
That’s all Pedro, just fudge a few numbers here and there. If their income is twenty-five hundred write thirty-five hundred.

PEDRO
I can do that. It’s simple.

Pedro stands up to see an elderly couple walk into the dealership.
Mr. Raterro stands up, walks over to Pedro and puts his arm around him.

MR. RATERRO
A little here and a little there and it will all add up in the end. It will add up to a new vehicle for them and a paycheck for you.

PEDRO
Okay Mr. Raterro, I can do it but ain’t all those people who got approved for all those home’s losing them now?

MR. RATERRO
Yes, but for a little while they lived the American dream and a lot people made a lot of money and isn’t that why we are here?

Pedro looks out of the big glass window watching the old couple touch and caress a new car.

MR. RATERRO (CONT’D)
So Pedro, do you still work here or are you going to go back to selling tacos off a truck? What about your kids Pedro?

Pedro’s shoulder’s droop and his heart sinks.

PEDRO
I still work here Raterro.

Pedro walks out of the sales office and Mr. Raterro dims the lights. Mr. Raterro looks like a demon in the corner of his office, salivating over what he has just done. Pedro walks up to an elderly Hispanic couple they are there to purchase what they hope is their last automobile.
The elderly couple are looking at the least expensive vehicle on the showroom floor.

PEDRO (CONT’D)
Why are you looking at this car, when you can have any vehicle out here on the showroom floor?

DON GARCIA
Mi esposa, I mean my wife and I are on social security, we know what we can afford.

PEDRO
But you’re in luck. I just left the sales manager’s office and he has just informed me that we now have creative financing. That means, that we will help you to buy the car of your dreams. And by the way, I have an esposa also. So you can talk to me in Spanish.

SFX, FOUR CORNERED ROOM, WAR
FADE SLOWLY TO BLACK.

F7Velez 2008 aka: el_callejero